Dear Nadine,

I've been curious about Salsa for several months but didn't quite know how to go about learning it (or if I'd even like it). Then all of the sudden I looked up at the schedule for the place where I recently started taking ballet/Jazz/hip-hop and I saw Salsa.

Now all of the sudden I'm thrown into a whole scene I know nothing about. I was surfing through the website and saw your column and would love to ask you some questions. I have learned already, for example, that Latino men can be awfully persistent. Any helpful hints that you wished someone clued you in on at the very beginning...etiquette, warnings, advice etc...?

Thanks so much!

I agree with you that some men are very persistent in the clubs. They just won't take a hint. This has happened to many women I know. One time, my friend, who is really a patient person, actually said, "Which part of "No" don't you understand?" I've also been nearly dragged out on the dance floor by my wrist. That's a definite no-go for me.

The first time a guy asks me to dance, I'll dance. If later I don't want to dance with him, I smile and decline politely. If he asks a second time, I smile and decline firmly and tell him I'm waiting for a salsa song, or that I'm resting a little. And then I move seats, or go find another friend, or go to the bar, or go to the ladies room and wash my hands or something. (Public Health Message: One can never wash one’s hands enough. A male friend and salsero once observed that 5 out of 7 guys did NOT wash their hands after doing their thing in the bathroom at a club.)

Another way to avoid these "infatuated with your looks" kind of people is to walk into a club, and search and stand by people you know. It's kind of harder to find people you know when you're just starting out. But if you go a few times, you'll recognize faces. Just walk right up to them, say hi, and ask if they don't mind you putting your coat on that chair as well. (Great way to find a spot to put stuff down if you get into a club too late to snag a table.) Most people are quite nice and don't mind at all.

Then, if you see an undesirable person approach, get quickly involved in conversation with your friend, or immediately ask them to go out onto the dance floor with you (you can ask guys or girls to dance. It's all good). Sometimes, these guys, who've been falling in love with you the whole night, will want to walk you to your car. If you can, ask a friend or acquaintance if they'd mind walking you to your car.

These situations seldom occur, but it happens. Its just part of the club scene. Have fun, be on defense and you'll be fine.